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So, Skunks Silver Jubilee Tournament... After having to get up at about 5am in order to be ready on time for it, I made my way down to the bus stop in some sort of half-awake daze. Eventually I got picked up and we went around and collected the other mohawks on the team. Since Shed, Petra, Adele, Rahat and Maggie pulled out, there were just the 7 of us..
  • Felchers (Felix)
  • Twat Beard (me)
  • Ben Hen (Ben)
  • Newbees (Julien)
  • Curry (Matt)
  • Fisty (Penny)
  • Ismell (Vicky)
It did occur to me before we left that seven people wasn't really enough - that left us with only two substitutes, which made the whole thing somewhat tiring. But more on that later - we arrived in plenty of time, and without crashing into a single petrol pump, which was nice.

Our first game was against Uriel, who I believe were from Exeter, or someplace like that. We were utterly dicked on, 12-0. It was only 9:30am and we'd all had minimal sleep, but still... After that, Vicky went off chatting to her tart (in the nicest possible way, of course) from Uriel, and I went to hang out with Aye Aye for a bit, cos I'm an honourary member. I really do like their don't-give-a-fuck-just-enjoy-the-game attitude, although it does tend to run out after a while, when they realise that they really do want to win at least one game...

Our second game was against Skunks 2, the second team of the tournament hosts. The final score was 4-2 to us, though they caught a dubious disc in the last few seconds, and since our goal-difference type thing was already fucked, I figured it couldn't hurt to just let them have the point (I was the nearest Mohawk to the action, so it was really kinda my call), even though I'm pretty sure they weren't entirely in the end-zone when they caught it. I managed to be either the thrower or catcher for three out of our four points, so I feel good... That's what being the long player does, I guess - glory hunting, woo... And one of them was a really tricky grab right on the sideline, so yay... Oh, and I got a large blow to the head, courtesy of Polly, the girl who put us up in November for the mini-tournament. But she was really apologetic, and it didn't hurt that much (I have a tough head an' stuff).

Our third game was against Brixton's Angels team, who beat us 11-2, but I did manage to score again in that match too, so that's good. Fourth game was against Mr Men (second place overall), and they beat us 11-2 as well, but again, I managed to score on them. And at one point, somebody put up a high floating disc, and me and two Mr Men players jumped up for it, and I just snatched it out of the air right in front of them, which made me feel really proud, because those guys are damned good.

Our last game of that day was against Brunel STD 1, who beat us 9-2. No real surprise there, they went on to do quite well and win the plate... After all that, we went to the swimming pool and spent some time there. Mostly seeing how long we could sit on the bottom of the deep-end for (I couldn't even get my arse down that far, my head hurt too much from the pressure by the time I got my feet to the 3m deep floor). That was all good and stuff...

Then that night, we went out for the team meal at Pizza Hut. Unsurprisingly, Curry ate twice as much as anybody else did, keeping up the tradition nicely... We had to wait for ages, while Loz and the Disc Doctors managed to get a table long before us by sending a couple of guys along early to reserve one for them (they didn't take pre-bookings unfortunately). Eventually we finished our meal, and went to the Hobbit for drinks. The fuckers wouldn't let me in without a driving license or proof of age card (like 21 year olds actually carry lame proof of age cards anyway), so instead of drinking, I hung out with one of the SkuMy players (old-school Soton team), who told stories of Mohawks teams from 6 years ago, and gave me a few tips and stuff...

After that, we went to Kaos, for a cheesy music night, which are always good. Felt ill until I vomit-burped outside, which made me feel a lot better. David, remember the time in Manchester when I had to throw up a load of air after Laser Quest? Same thing... I'm physically unable to burp, which means that trapped gas (from fizzy drinks and the like) just stays in my stomach, causing me lots of pain until I force it out by practically throwing up (although no gunk comes out). Anyway, you don't need to know that stuff...

The club was fun, they played some Chesney, some Proclaimers, Beatles, Abba, Bonnie Tyler, all the fun stuff... Spent the evening with the Aye-Aye people, Penny and Vicky... Oh, and they had a big projector there, which was showing Star Trek: First Contact and Starship Troopers, albeit without sound. That provided some fun for quite a while - Starship Troopers is such a good movie. They should show it everywhere in America right now, and perhaps wake people up to the message that propaganda and needless warmongering isn't good for you.

After the club we wandered the mile or two back to the house we were staying at, and all collapsed into sleeping bags on loads of mattresses on the floor, and had a few hours of sleep. It wasn't nearly enough, but still, it was better than nothing. Got up the next day, and after some sweet driving by Nicole, managed to get to our first (9am) game versus UCL on time. Unfortunately, we lost 5-3, after some brave fighting, and the obvious impediment of being hung over and tired.

Our second game that day was against the Skunks' third team, and we lost (despite beating their second team the previous day). I put it down partly to them having twice the players - we only had two subs, and Vicky didn't play much in that game, which meant all our players were stuck on the pitch for ages, whereas they could swap a lot. But at the end of the day, they scored more points than us, and tiredness is no excuse - they just outplayed us.

The next game should have been the most fun - Mohawks vs. Aye-Aye. Unfortunately, after both our teams had been losing a load of games, nobody was really up for just messing around, everybody wanted to win too much. Given that both teams were finishing in the bottom four, you'd think nobody would really care about exact positions, but they did. It was a real shame, it could've been much more fun. But it was a good game, well fought, and ended up as a 5-4 win to us. I did my part for Aye-Aye by not scoring or assisting in a single point, though not entirely deliberately (although there was one point where we were in possession and I just sat down in their end zone and didn't do anything until it turned over, just for fun).

Their call after the game was fun, they had us all kneel down in a circle, facing inwards, with our eyes closed, then charged at us screaming. We were convinced they were gonna execute us or something, but as it turned out, they gave us massages instead, which was really good of them. We had got a really nasty call ready in case they did something mean, but in light of that, we had a horse-race type thing around the grass nearby... Then we took team photos - I tried to get in the back of Aye-Aye's one, since it's always fun to be in other teams' photos (some guy got into ours...).

Final game was for 21st/22nd place, against Surrey Slingers. They had massive support since they also had the old-school-surrey team (Disconduct) there egging them on. It was close fought, especially since they were made up of a-team players, and we were largely a b/c-team. We managed to win it 5-4, but it was really close, and standing on the sideline as the clock ticked down on the last point was real agony... It was almost like watching a penalty shoot-out in a football match - that sort of sick feeling of anticipation...

Then came the various finals. The main final was Yo Mama vs Mr Men - a Southampton derby. It was a really great game, good spirit throughout, and had the single most amazing layout I've ever seen, by one of the Yo Mama players. She caught it while falling horizontally, with the tips of her toes still in the pitch, thus scoring the point in the endzone. Fantastic stuff... It finished on a draw, so it went to sudden death with Mr Men in possession. After passing it around a bit, it turned over, and Yo Mama scored, thus winning the tournament. 'twas a great final :o)

Anyhow, we came back to Uni, with Stuart, a player from Fingers 6 (Manchester Met's team), and one of the guys we met up at Edinburgh Beginners (he was one of F6's experienced players). We all went to practice for a couple of hours, which was great fun, although by the end of it, I was in sufficient pain that I couldn't run any more (I'd played the whole tournament on a busted knee and a groin strain, so it hurt a bit). And then home time...

Next tournament I'm going to is either Not The Nationals (15th February, Manchester) or Aye-Aye (8th March, Norwich), depending on whether they can find enough A-Team players for NTN or not. If they can't, I stand a chance of getting to go, which I'd love - 'twould be a great experience. Otherwise, it's Aye-Aye. And after that - Rimini. I've been watching the Rimini video with Jimbo tonight - looks great, I can't wait :o)

Anyhow, that's the weekend... It was good :o)

PS - Felix, in case you read this, this isn't my tournament report, don't worry. The tourny report I'll do for the team will be far less centred around me, fear not ;o)

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A man who can't burp? Wow...

Sorry to be dense but what's the Rimini video?

A video of Paganello 2002 (World Beach Ultimate Cup) at Rimini Beach, Italy

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