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The oldies are the best...
2012
unknownj
FEUDALISM
You have two cows. Your lord takes some of the milk.

PURE SOCIALISM
You have two cows. The government takes them and puts them in a barn with everyone else's cows. You have to take care of all the cows. The government gives you all the milk you need.

BUREAUCRATIC SOCIALISM
Your cows are cared for by ex-chicken farmers. You have to take care of the chickens the government took from the chicken farmers. The government gives you as much milk and eggs the regulations say you should need.

FASCISM
You have two cows. The government takes both, hires you to take care of them, sells you the milk.

PURE COMMUNISM
You have two cows. Your neighbours help you take care of them, and you all share the milk.

REAL WORLD COMMUNISM
You share two cows with your neighbours. You and your neighbours bicker about who has the most "ability" and who has the most "need". Meanwhile, no one works, no one gets any milk, and the cows drop dead of starvation.

RUSSIAN COMMUNISM
You have two cows. You have to take care of them, but the government takes all the milk. You steal back as much milk as you can and sell it on the black market.

PERESTROIKA
You have two cows. You have to take care of them, but the Mafia takes all the milk. You steal back as much milk as you can sell it on the "free" market.

CAMBODIAN COMMUNISM
You have two cows. The government takes both and shoots you.

MILITARIANISM
You have two cows. The government takes both and drafts you.

TOTALITARIANISM
You have two cows. The government takes them and denies they ever existed. Milk is banned.

PURE DEMOCRACY
You have two cows. You neighbours decide who gets the milk.

REPRESENTATIVE DEMOCRACY
You have two cows. Your neighbours pick someone to tell you who gets the milk.

BRITISH DEMOCRACY
You have two cows. You feed them sheep's brains and they go mad. The government doesn't do anything.

BUREAUCRACY
You have two cows. At first the government regulates what you can feed them and when you can milk them. Then it pays you not to milk them. Then it takes both, shoots one, milks the other and pours the milk down the drain. Then it requires you to fill out forms accounting for the missing cows.

PURE ANARCHY
You have two cows. Either you sell the milk at a fair price or your neighbours try to take the cows and kill you.

PURE CAPITALISM
You have two cows. You sell one and buy a bull.

CAPITALISM
You don't have any cows. The bank will not lend you money to buy cows, because you don't have any cows to put up as collateral.

ENVIRONMENTALISM
You have two cows. The government bans you from milking or killing them.

POLITICAL CORRECTNESS
You are associated with (the concept of "ownership" is a symbol of phallo centric, war mongering, intolerant past) two differently aged (but no less valuable to society) bovines of non-specified gender.

SURREALISM
You have two giraffes. The government requires you to take harmonica lessons

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One day, a Surrealist government will take office. Or rather, take an office, for they will somehow steal one.

If I were them, I'd steal a banana and say it was an office...

Then then hollow it out and work in it, presumably.

Someone just posted this to the University of Lincolnshire & Humberside forums with one addition:

ULH DICTATORSHIP: You have two cows. You were told to hand them over to the government in a week, two days before the deadline they decide to give you another two weeks. Nobody knows the actual deadline. you find out when it is with 3hrs to go and you can't find your cows. You illegaly borrow someone elses cows and hand them in 2hrs late, they are stamped as late. Accomodation charges you a £20 handling charge even though they had nothing to do with it. The government don't notice the cows aren't yours and despite them being perfect they decide they aren't satisfactory because one of their names isn't spelled with a capital letter. You have to hand them in again in the summer.


And it is very true : )

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