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Jo
2012
unknownj
Help!

Fundamental to my belief in the higher-power nature of love is the premise that you cannot love more than one person at any given time. Right?

Wrong!

See, I spoke to Jo earlier. And, well, quite frankly, EEK! Frankly, what the hell was up with me? How on Earth did I let her go like I did? And why has it taken me so long to realise that I'm crazy about her?

To be honest, I doubt that I can be in love with Vicky. As I said to David earlier, put Jo and Vix in front of me and make me choose, and it's Jo every single time. But this puts me in a pickle - after all, I'm either in love with somebody who lives next door to me with whom I have no chance at all, or with somebody who lives hundreds of miles away, with whom I have no chance at all, or with somebody who lives thousands of miles away who I barely know, with whom I have no chance at all. Or all of them. None of these is a good situation. HELP!

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Love exclusive to one person?!
Where the hell did you get that idea?!

Too much christian brain washing me thinks....

And my advice to you J, is step back. Stop "fancying" every second bird that talks to you.
This may be easier said than done, but you must take some control.

And in my personal opinion "love" is something much more special and rare than you can ever experience without years of being together. And to be quite frank, (again in my opinion) "love" is only found by very few people only 1/3 of all couples (married or otherwise) even come close and only 1/3 of *them* have what I would even begin to term "love".
So, and far be it from me to dictate your feelings, I think you should stop thinking of it as "love" and more as childish (No insult intended) "fancying".

Well... I had previously held the belief that the special thing called "love" was a predetermined thing, which ultimately works out for the best... I also believed that it works in series, rather than in parallel. Stupid? Yes. Idealistic? Yes. Romantic? Yes. But it made me feel happier to believe that. And I object to any implication of Christian values here. Ooh, there's a subject for a new post :o)

As to your own opinion of love - no offence (after all, you're a friend, I respect your opinion, but what I'm about to say isn't quite in line with it) but bollocks to that. I have been in love before, and that time I was really sure of it. I know I've been in love, and I'd only known the girl for a couple of months, and not especially well for much of that time. And with every day that's gone by since then, I've only become more and more convinced that I was in love. And I hadn't even met her when I fell in love with her - only knew her via e-mail and chat. Sad, I know. But then I met her, and stayed with her for a week. And I knew that when I had told her at first that I was in love with her, that I meant every word, and that it was becoming more true with every second. The Vicky thing I thought was love, and believe me, I've lived in the same confined flat as her for 12 weeks, chatting to her for ages every day and going out with her many nights - this is more than enough to convince me that I know her well enough. And as for Jo - very complex, and I won't get into it here :o)

However, the nature of love can be debated for as long as you like, and nobody will change their minds - this is one of these things that depends on the person. And I'm that tired that I probably made loads of errors in that post, and didn't get my point across. Anyhow.....

I suppose we can both agree that "love" is in the eyes of the beholder. Or in other words, each persons opinion of "love" is their own true love.

Only *you* can know love when it happens, and I cannot know that you aren't in that 1/3 of a 1/3 of my definition, just as you can't, but what you can know is whether or not you are in love. Although, as I said before, I believe that before you can know this you must be able to stand back and time (as with "the girl" in your entry) gives you this benefit. Unfortunatly, time is something you are short of when you are in a relationship and it is often only after, that you have the time to look back...

Actually, I think you can love quite a few people at one time - not that that makes for an easy life or anything. ;-)

/me is sympathetic

At least it confirms what I was already thinking :o)

Which either a) is comforting in that you're not alone in thinking this, or b) terrifying when you consider who it is that's agreeing with you.

:-D

Must be the former. The latter is working on the misguided assumption that a likeness to your way of thinking is a bad thing :o)

Open a window, my ego needs air tonight. ;-)

A window? Your weather must be better than ours then... I opened my window and almost got sucked out...

Hey, how come my conversations always end up discussing weather?!?

Maybe you're just a well-rounded sorta guy? ;-)

Yea, maybe, but what are the odds? :o)

Oh, significant, surely! :-D

That's what I thought, but others have expressed doubt... :o)

Bah, they know nothing. ;-)

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